Post — Aaron Ngo

The promo teased us all week about April Kepner's fate. I cried and worried this may be the end for our beloved surgeon, but highly unlikely because they are showing us this in a promo for the episode. Not the best way to sendoff a character. But nonetheless, these questions swarmed my brain the entire week and episode.

Is she going to make it?
Did she die?
Why is this happening?

All valid questions. This is an emotional rollercoaster filled with callbacks to the earlier seasons like Jackson's lack of belief in God, Meredith's own drowning and satisfying afterlife scenario, and the April/Matthew relationship during seasons 9 and 10.

Emotional tear-jerking spoilers approaching:

The episode does start light-hearted. April is alive and sends out Jo&Alex's wedding invitations to everyone. It's super cheesy and romantic, even Jo and Alex get one. They jokingly put a "maybe" on the invitation and continue to admire it. I cannot believe these two are getting married in one week's time.

Tragedy strikes shortly after this. A car gets rolled over on the road because ice and the first victim to arrive is Matthew Taylor. In his daze, he asks about April but is too vague about it because it sounds like she may or may not have been in the car.

We'll get into why they're driving together, but for now, everyone panic!!

Owen goes searching for her and finds her in the ravine. She is unconscious and practically dead. Everyone is put on high alert when Owen brings April in, but nobody tells Jackson about her condition to keep him focused on some burn victims.

The team tries to keep her temperature up and to get her blood circulating. Meredith reminds everyone she went through this back in season three and Derek saved her. April is not lost to them just yet. Everyone takes turns pounding April's chest and refuse to talk about her like she is dead.

Meredith is overwhelmed by her memories and April's familiar situation. She bursts into tears when Alex mentions going to meet April for cake-tasting. She brings Alex into the mix and he drops some serious compliments for her, a rare treat considering he's done nothing but make fun of her the entire time.

Eventually Jackson discovers April's condition and runs into the OR. He is heartbroken and his beautiful eyes get filled with tears. I admire his eyes and the way they work. If you can fall in love with someone's eyes and nothing else about them, that's how I feel about Jackson Avery. His performance was the best part of the episode.

The next part is the worst. The team got the temperature up and the blood going I think, but now they gotta wait for a heartbeat. Maggie is the MVP for not giving up on her. She swears on the woman's life that she sees a rhythm and starts shocking her. Nothing happens and Jackson begs her to stop.

But once they get Jackson off April, Maggie shocks her one more time and her heartbeat returns. April is alive and Meredith cheers!

But it's not over yet. Seriously? Why are they doing this to us? I'm a crying mess over here.

The Grey-Sloan family waits to see if she wakes up.

Pause on April and let's talk about the return of Nicole Herman.

If you can recall, Herman was Arizona's mentor and taught her everything she knew about fetal surgery before her tumor could kill her. Amelia stepped in and saved Herman's life but it came at the cost of her sight.

She is still blind but worries the tumor returned. Herman messes with the two of them again, pretending to have her sight again for a minute. How we've missed her sense of humor.

Amelia wants to tell Herman about her own tumor because guilt, but that is lifted by the episode's end. Herman reveals she knows about Amelia's tumor because Tom Koracick informed her (in bed! The dude is making his way) and praises it because it made Amelia "crazy enough" to save her life. She offers a fist bump, but Amelia does not accept.

DeLuca steps in because we can't leave her hanging. Too funny!

Nicole does catch up with Arizona and informs her prodigy about following her successes. Arizona is not pleased to see her because Herman bailed since she went blind. Then Nicole Herman reveals she didn't know how to thank her properly and still doesn't. It's the reason she never returned Arizona's calls.

She continues talking and discusses with Arizona about her inspiration. Teaching Arizona inspired her to teach other fetal surgeons and now she's saving morel lives. This leads to a grant for a women's health center and a chance for Arizona to get her super cool crash cart spread across the country.

When Herman even offers Arizona the chance to start it in New York, all the pieces are officially aligned for her departure. Please don't go Arizona! I'm sure we can find more creative stories for you!! I don't care what Shonda Rimes has to say about it!!

After this, Arizona and Amelia are updated on April's condition.

Arizona stays by her friend's side with all of the other main characters and even Ben Warren who's on Station 19. Wow it's like they took the day off or something the way the scene is arranged. Arizona also drops a major bomb: April and Matthew are dating again! ---- let's all cry because they've fallen in love with each other again.

Goodbye April! Goodbye Arizona! You're both getting booted off and the signs are clearly there. I hate this so much. Why do I care about April? This feeling didn't exist until I almost saw her die.

That's right. Almost!

Eventually Jackson is left alone in the room. He finally gives into April's belief and prays to God. He wants to believe and does so to get April back. His gorgeous eyes made my regular ones weep for the young lad.

Praying has a special place in my heart. I did it once and it was the most spiritual experience of my life. Seeing Jackson give faith a chance was a reminder of my own personal time with religion and how it gave me the strength to see the important things in life.

Then the greatest Grey-Sloan miracle occurs. April squeezes Jackson's hand and opens her eyes. She teases Jackson about praying and insists she didn't die and come back to life because she didn't meet Jesus.

Arizona keeps crying with the rest of us, but April keeps assuring her that she's okay. Everything will be okay. April is grateful to Maggie because she didn't give up and keeps holding her hands because they're warm. THIS IS TOO MUCH! AWE!!

WHAT'S MORE? THERE'S MORE!

Matthew and April reunite and sleep next to each other, holding hands! They're back together and it's going to send her straight out of this show. I would normally have mixed feelings about such a pairing, but it's whatever because April is leaving.

Then there's Meredith, who wonders if April met dead people like her dead dog.

Why did she have to bring up the dog? What a throwback!

This inspires Meredith to reevaluate her own life. Everything she got after her drowning in season three: Derek, the kids, her marriage, and her career were all big bonuses for her. In the episode's closing moments, she retires Derek's scrub hat and puts it on top of the Post-It Note in her dresser.

Wow! I am in awe that we're one episode away from the season finale. This current season blew my expectations away. After the dreadful thirteen season, this is a big step up and a refresher on what makes Grey's Anatomy so wonderful.

Comment or cry in the comments. This episode took a lot out of me, but Station 19 is calling my name. So look out for that review as well.

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